The words rolled over her then, crushed her flat as piecrust beneath a rolling pin. She watched him shaping the words with his mouth, this doctor whom she had grudgingly agreed to see after her husband had had what he thought was the last word in their long argument. Go.
Now there was another word. Cancer. And others, too. Treatment. Pain.
This man, this doctor in his chair. He pulled out words as though they were stones from his pocket, polished shiny and smooth with much use, set them carefully before her on the barren wood of his medical desk.
Stunning.
Beautifully written, with enduring images that will linger
Dear J Hardy,
Karen took my word, ‘stunning.’ I can imagine that’s what those words would feel like.
Shalom,
Rochelle
A poignant tale well written.
What vivid and emotional imagery, amplified by the photo of the crashing waves. Excellent piece.
Two polished men, I truly hope they have supportive arms. I like the style of this piece of writing
Wonderful story. Very powerful, gripping lines. To be perfectly honest I aspire to write with such power in so few words. Masterful.
Holy moly, Graham. That’s a nice thing to say. Thanks.
That “words as stones” line is pretty close to magic.
Often wonder how empathetic can a Doctor really be when he’s telling the 10th person this week that they have a terminal illness? It’s like vets, do they simply become numb to putting animals to sleep. Must take a tough mindset.
Brilliantly tight and powerful writing.
Sometimes we fear the words even more than their consequences I think
Brilliantly written. Wow.
Using the sea pics to write a painful tale!
You are great!
I saw WORDS and wondered…now I am just awestruck. You are the doctor – I am the patient.
Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me – never a more untrue saying. It’s been said already, but those words/stones are priceless.
The words crushed her like pastry – a powerful image.
What an exquisite piece of prose-writing this is!
The imagery lingers in my mind, even after the story’s over.
This is beautiful:
“This man, this doctor in his chair. He pulled out words as though they were stones from his pocket, polished shiny and smooth with much use, set them carefully before her on the barren wood of his medical desk.”
Something in the syntax towards the end reminds me of Raymond Carver, not sure what. Whatever it is, your writing is beautiful.
A very interesting and symbolic take on the prompt. Very poignant and well written.
Powerful work.
I love the last bit about words and how the doctor pulls them out like stones in his pocket. This is great!
Wow, this is amazing.