You ever stop to think that your whole life might hang on a decision you don’t actually decide? That your fate, everything that will happen to you from this point forward, hangs from a thread no thicker than a spider’s web?
Of course you don’t. Nobody does. You go through you day on automatic pilot, drive to work, drive to the store. You’re thinking about your mortgage or a dream you had or screwing the checkout girl at the grocery. You make a million decisions without knowing, each one leading to the next, each one building up to something you hope is good.
And then something happens, something real. Something bad. Time slows down and you’re all of a sudden paying close attention. When something bad happens that can’t be undone, the first thing you want to do is find out why. Blame somebody. Blame yourself, probably. And you’re right to do so, because who is this all happening to, anyway?
This is what I thought about when I got the call about Jen. This is all I ever think about, now and forever. I was going to put on the snow tires when she got home. That morning I was just too busy. I got held up. I ran out of time.
Your life is made the tiny moments and decisions you don’t notice. When you say goodbye to somebody, it might be for the last time.
Good to remember that.
Excellent and true, but maybe not fiction ;-)
I fixed it by adding a paragraph. It was more like a lecture before. Thanks!
Haunting and lovely. The sense of it was always there.
Very true. I have a friend whose husband went to help with something, and when he left the house, it was the last time she saw him alive. One look the wrong way, one slip of the foot, a slip of the hand, and *poof* gone.
Given your laudibly excellent and still prodigious output we can expect some not so excellent moments. Thin as spider web is nearly forgivable but indeed, it does sound even less like a lecture (a terrible sin I suffer from most of the time) and more like Oprah.
Yeah, I’m with you there. Not my favorite piece either. I thought about hamming it up with dialect, but that would put it in Speedway Randy territory. Hopefully the crap I’m putting into my novel is better, but today I kind of doubt it.
Within the context of the story I think the line works fine. I also think the ‘lecture’ style adds to the tension.
I liked how you told the story. So many of us take things for granted. :)