It is only when she doesn’t seek him that she knows he is truly there. She feels his breath on her collar, yet will not turn to see.
She believes her eyes have the power to make him disappear, perhaps forever, and this she will not do.
His presence does not comfort, does not agitate. She does not feel less alone, yet there is something about his existence that she needs.
She likens him to the invisible air, breathed every second without thought, only felt and truly appreciated when it is gone, since its presence is required for all other presences.