Deserts

by , under Fiction Prompts, Flash Fiction, Friday Fictioneers

“Like a drink?”

Without waiting for me to answer she handed me a beading glass. I took a sip. “The good stuff. And in the wedding glassware, no less.”

“I thought you deserved something special after the day you had.” She gentled the back of my neck like I was a skittish horse. “My man.”

I took another drink. “It feels strange. It’s nice to be recognized, but still.”

“You deserve it. I always knew your day would come. Now the world knows what I knew the day I met you.”

“And that is?”

She shrugged, smiling down at me.

 

Friday Fictioneers

  1. neilmacdon

    I think this is probably a story about a loyal and supportive wife, But there are a couple of things (probably unintentional) that suggest she may have poisoned him,
    * I took another drink. “It feels strange>>> does the drink taste strange?
    * She shrugged, smiling down at me>>> has he collapsed?
    Also should “She gentled back of my neck” be gentled the back?

    Reply
  2. MrBinks

    I think this is more sinister than the words would have you believe. Really interesting!

    Reply
  3. rochellewisoff

    Dear Josh,

    I saw this as a supportive wife. I loved “gentled the back of my neck.” Love the scene and what might not be being said. (Oy, such a sentence.) Good one in any case.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Reply
  4. Lynn Love

    Add me to the sickos! It was subtly done, but I’m sure there are dark deeds afoot. Why would she say that about knowing what he was like from when they first met, but not say what. And Neil’s right – that link from the drink to ‘It feels strange’ – suspect indeed.
    Is it us, or was that sinister undertone intentional. Great stuff anyway

    Reply
  5. Madison Ward

    Most would probably read this as a loving wife getting a drink for gerhard working husband. I read it as an evil wife killing him! But then, I always see the dark side!

    Reply
  6. draliman

    Well, I didn’t think it sinister. I was going to comment “Aw, sweet” until I read the comments. Which is strange for me, as I’m constantly killing people off :-)

    Reply
    • J Hardy Carroll

      I am no stranger to violence in my as well. The idea came to me after I’d had an extraordinary good day at work where everything seemed to to go right. I was struck by how my first thought was to be suspicious of it. I just took that attitude and Infused the characters with it. Perhaps that is what people were picking up on or perhaps that it was just such a short piece that they were able to put their own spin on it. Also, I think we’ve got some very sick people in this group ;-)

      Reply
  7. Joy Pixley

    It feels like you left it deliberately vague at the end, with the shrug. But I keep thinking she’s supportive rather than sinister. He doesn’t say the drink feels strange, after all; it seems he’s saying that it feels strange to be recognized (presumably at work, where he presumably just had a big, exciting, but stressful day), and she’s doing her part to recognize him, too.

    Reply
  8. pennygadd51

    Of course, she could just be a supportive wife hoping to cash in on his unexpected success after years of putting up with his ‘daydreams’.

    Reply
  9. granonine

    Huh. More going on here than meets the eye. I can’t decide who the bad guy is–or if there IS one. Great job of keeping us on the edges of our chairs!

    Reply
  10. Dale

    We do have a sinister bunch in this group, don’t we? I am going to choose the positive. Just to be different.

    Reply

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